Tuesday, April 09, 2013
April 9, 2013
Later on, Jesus revealed himself again to the disciples. It was by the Sea of Tiberias, and it happened like this: Simon Peter, Thomas called the Twin, Nathaniel from Cana in Galilee, the sons of Zebedee and two more of his disciples were together. Simon Peter said, 'I'm going fishing.' They replied, 'We'll come with you.' They went out and got into the boat but caught nothing that night. When it was already light, there stood Jesus on the shore, though the disciples did not realize that it was Jesus.
I am going to the shore today. Someone is waiting for me there.
There are moments in the gospels that are easy to see, and so many others I want to see but cannot, which is frustrating because seeing brings me peace. Today, I see.
Jesus stands there waiting. His bare feet on the sand, he looks across the watery expanse as Peter and the others pull at the oars and creep across the waves.
The water was a safe place for Peter, a place apart where troubles evaporated in work, waves and the winds which he understood, knowing when to make for shore as storms brewed. His head was clear on the water. He knew who he was and what to do.
But that was then. This was on the other side of Jesus, and the water no longer allowed escape, not from the pain of having failed his promise to stand with Jesus, not from the ache of missing the sound of his voice and the way it felt to be near him.
The water no longer gave him what he needed. Only Jesus, the feeling of his nearness, the sight of his face, the welcome of his open hands and the silence of his soul could silence the pain of his own.
He did not know it, yet. But Jesus stood on the shore, waiting for him to see and surrender his attempts to give peace to his own soul and receive the peace that only Jesus can give.
Peter does not yet see, but I do. I see him standing there. So I make my way to shore repeating the words, “Only Jesus. Only Jesus. Only you.”
They are my mantra, the rowing of my soul against the waves that pull me away. Two short words fix my vision on Jesus standing there, waiting.
The sight brings peace beyond the futility of my efforts to give my heart what it most needs. What I most need is you, Jesus. Only you.
Pr. David L. Miller